Flower meanings

What Flowers to Send for Sympathy and Funerals

November 11, 2026 · 4 min read · Lux Berry & Bloom, Ottawa

For sympathy and funerals, the safest and most traditional choices are white or soft pastel flowers: white roses, lilies, hydrangeas, carnations and chrysanthemums. Send a bouquet or a lasting gift such as preserved roses to the family's home, and send an arrangement to the funeral home when you want to honour the person at the visitation or service.

The most fitting sympathy flowers

Flower	What it usually conveys
White roses	Reverence, peace and remembrance
Red roses	Deep love, often from a spouse, partner or close family
Lilies	Peace and the restored innocence of the soul; a classic funeral flower
Hydrangeas	Heartfelt emotion and gratitude
Carnations	Remembrance; white carnations suggest pure love
Chrysanthemums	Common at funerals in North America and in many European countries

White and cream feel calm and respectful. Soft pinks, lavender and pale blue add warmth, which many families appreciate at home. Bright, celebratory colours are usually best avoided unless you know the person loved them.

Home or funeral home: where to send flowers

Both are appropriate, and they do different jobs.

To the family's home: a vase bouquet or a preserved rose arrangement comforts the family in the quiet days after the service, when the visitors have gone. This is the usual choice if you cannot attend.
To the funeral home: an arrangement placed at the visitation or service honours the person who died. Share the funeral home's name, the name of the deceased, and the date and time of the visitation or service.

For a funeral home delivery in Ottawa, call or text 819-208-3034 with those details so we can plan the delivery around the service.

Respecting faith and family wishes

Customs vary, so it is worth a quick check before you order:

Flowers are not customary at traditional Jewish funerals or during shiva. Food for the family or a charitable donation is the usual gesture.
Some Muslim families prefer simple observances, and practices differ, so ask a relative or close friend if you are unsure.
If the obituary says "in lieu of flowers", the family has asked for donations instead. You can still send a small gift to the home later if you know them well.

Lilies and pets

Lilies are a traditional sympathy flower, but true lilies (Lilium) and daylilies (Hemerocallis) are extremely toxic to cats. Even pollen or vase water can cause kidney failure. If the family has a cat, or you are not sure, choose roses, hydrangeas or a preserved arrangement instead. If a cat does come into contact with a lily, call a veterinarian or a pet poison control line right away.

Lasting gifts and practical details

Preserved roses are real roses that stay beautiful for a year or more without water, so they become a keepsake long after a fresh bouquet fades. They suit families who are overwhelmed with flowers in the first week.

Add your card message at checkout and we hand-write it on a card. Keep it short and sincere: "Thinking of you and your family" or "With deepest sympathy and love." Delivery is priced by distance from our studio in Carp, near Kanata, from $10 to $55, with the exact fee shown at checkout.